Saturday, May 30, 2015

10 Rules for making it through life

I'm not the source of all wisdom and truth about life. If I were, I'd either be a teenager or a long-white-bearded Mr Miyagi-Dumbledore-Gandalf super hybrid.  

But, nonetheless, over my three-plus decades on this planet, here are the ten rules I've discerned for making it through life (in no particular order)...

1 - Bad things happen. Life is not fair. Flowing on from the points I jotted down from a Steve Biddulph talk in this post. Sometimes, you're not in control of what happens to you.

2 - Surround yourself with people who will care and, when needed, protect you. Have people in your life who want what's best for you physically, mentally, emotionally, relationally, spiritually and experientially.

3 - Learn where and amongst whom you can be safe and vulnerable. Spend lots of time with them, at those places.

4 - You deserve the best help possible. It's okay, healthy even, to talk to people who are trained to help you order and process the world around you. It's not a sign of weakness, but strength.

5 - Realise, often, you're already in a future which, previously, you found hard to imagine. Because life's not fair (#1), we can struggle to picture the next step/s. For many of us, we've been in a similar mindset previously, and, thankfully, managed to pull through.

6 - Life presents us with difficult or scary decisions which will require courage. Draw strength from the times when people, particularly yourself, have made courageous choices in the past.

7 - Boundaries are good and healthy. Don't apologise for, lovingly, asserting your own. But, be aware that you'll live with the consequences if you don't enforce or maintain them.

8 - You are not as alone as you think. You, in all probability, are not the first one to be faced with your troubles or the only one going through them currently.

9 - You are more significant than you realise. As I mentioned when I wrote about suicide, there are lots of people who care for you and have their lives deeply affected by your presence.

10 - Time does not heal all wounds, it just creates scars. In order for life to make positive progress, action - sometimes courageous (#6) - is required.

BONUS - #11 - You will be deeply missed when you are gone. Inevitably, your life will end. The shame about funerals is that the person who has died will never get to see the faces, feel the emotions and hear the eulogies from those who are left behind.

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