Solving all your Palm Sunday related problems

I've never claimed to be original. I will, relatively shamelessly, use, reuse, tweak and "adapt" things I have used and resources I've stumbled upon. 

So, just like I do every year, I lead my new church in the annual ritual of making palm leaf crosses.

And, like every year, I had to beg, borrow and steal palm branches from far and wide.

And, just like 2011, I had an epiphany from last Sunday.

In light of the effort every church goes to in order to pull off an epic palm Sunday, I want to make two resolutions that will rule over Christendom (if I were Pope Francis, this would have been my first announcement).

From now on, every church must do two things...

First, there must be a register of every adequate palm tree in suburban gardens and parks and everyone MUST allow church folk to come and prune them, free of charge, 10 days prior to Easter.

Second, before any church is built it MUST have planted within it's grounds at least two palm trees.

That is all.

Drinking UNTIL...

Sometimes I mention something, thinking I've posted about it previously, only to later discover that the snippet of wisdom has gone unrecorded.

A few days ago I wrote about the partying lifestyle some Christians can have and the unexpected price it can cost them.

During that post I mentioned, from what I've seen, that young adults drink irresponsibly until sometime in there mid-twenties.

Why then?
Because UNTIL...

If you're indulging in the party lifestyle, you'll do it UNTIL...

Until you get over it (how long can you go to the same local, seeing the same people, doing the same things, weekend after weekend?).

Until you see the futility in it (how long can you afford to go out, spending increasing amounts of cash to get drunk, forgetting the end of the night anyway?).

Until something bad happens publicly (you're assaulted, arrested, caught drink-driving or have an unwanted/regrettable sexual encounter).

Until something bad happens privately (you break up a friendship or relationship).

Until your life stage changes and you grow out of it (you get married, you have a child, you get a mortgage, you get a full time job).

As a sweeping generalisation... young adults are partied out by 27. By then you've been going out for around a decade and have hit an UNTIL stage.

Focusing on the good thermometers

From 72 there were 12...

From 12 there were 3.

Not all people are treated the same.

Some you are closer with since you're personalities mesh or you share a common interest. With some you're drawn to them since they hold influence.

This later group can both gauge and move the temperature of the group.

In every church there are a few people who are good thermometers.

In every youth group there are a couple of good thermometers.

Within every youth ministry leadership team there are those who will be able to judge and affect the temperature quicker than others.

In ministry, the people you want to connect with first are these who discern and influence the temperate around them.

With luck, these people will be some of the most valuable relationships in any placement.

You'll be able to bounce ideas off them and avoid land-mines.

You'll be able to receive for honest feedback, from both a personal and communal level.

Finally, when pitching a new idea, when you get the temperature alert onside then the way forward can be much smoother.

When partying bites you in the a$$

Life isn't meant to be boring.
Surprisingly for some, this is even true for Christians.

I don't mind a party (or at least before Hanna was born I didn't!).
I've stayed out late and wandered the streets at all hours of the morning.
For better or worse, I've gone out and had some crazy adventures.

And sometimes it bit me in the ass.

I've embarrassed myself.
I've slept in.
I've been hungover.

But, as far as I'm aware, there's one aspect in life where it didn't cost me. Getting a girlfriend.

But others aren't so fortunate.

For, looking back in hindsight, partying can have a cost which many (especially guys) aren't aware of.

For, given enough time, eventually you'll need to choose...

• Partying or
• A believer who is mature enough to not be attracted to a social-butterfly-party-child.

The sad news? You'll eventually grow out of the impressing your mates by going out until the wee hours of the night (usually around your mid-twenties).

Even sadder? The quality women you'll repel by your lifestyle and never know.

This is the most worst area partying bites you in the ass.

Three questions for your world-view...

This year I'm teaching scripture at a local high school every fortnight for the class who has been split up because they are... overly enthusiastic in class.

Currently they are looking at world religions, with today's class on Hinduism.

To a Westerner. I'll admit, it sounds strange.

As I was talking to the head scripture teacher about the religion, he mentioned the filter he lead the kids through when looking at alternate world-views. 

His three questions were...

Does it make sense? (Is it logical?)
Does it satisfy those who are believers? (What is it's endpoint for life and suffering?)
Can you live it out in today's world?

Improv baptism?

At college this week I had a conversation about baptism and salvation. The person I was speaking to held the belief that you needed to be baptised, in addition to trusting in Jesus, to be saved. 

I disagreed. I said that whilst baptism is a positive thing, it was an outward sign of an inward event which had already occurred (giving Jesus Lordship of your life). I argued that you won't be kicked out of heaven if you've missed getting dunked. Instead you'll be judged on how you've responded to Jesus.

At one point I was asked if I would baptise a kid in my youth ministry... Acts 8:36 style... once they became a Christian.

I had no real answer, but the conversation did bring to mind an impromptu baptism which took place at a camp years ago.

At the time it felt strange but I could never work out why.

My conversation this week cleared up my uneasiness.

When you get baptised, you not only join with Christ and identify with what He has done (like Romans 6 says), but a community of believers.

Thus, without this wider community present, I would defer the impromptu baptism.

You must do this if you want people to change...

Sometimes I post things here as a reminder for myself. This should be one of those occasions.

In theory, it should be a post I go back to often. 

Just to remember.

The memorable lesson which sprung to my mind due to this post?

If you're going to ask people to change you need to tell them two things...

1 - Why the change will be for their benefit and
2 - What staying in the same place will cost them.

Listen and think for a change

Following from my previous post about a Guy Sebastian song inspiring Friday night's input time, I have an admission.

It wasn't somthing I would usually do.

In fact, the whole listen-to-a-song-and-disect-it-idea was something I inherited from the previous youth minister.

But, the more I think about it and consider why I've repeatedly done the youth adult film based bible studies, the more value I find it in.

Churches should engage in culture. Often.

Youth ministers should be aware of the culture their "audience" is immersed in.

AND... they shouldn't be shy in teaching those who are especially influenced by the culture around them to interact with it and evaluate the messages it's sending.

Perhaps, my once-a-month song segment will be expanded...

But... this is no way means that I'll be listening to One Direction in order to "discern a message."

Can't we all just get along?

Last Friday night I played the Guy Sebastian song "Get Along," using it as inspiration for the input time.

I wondered if Guy was right and we should all just get along.

For, as nice and tolerant as the song may seem, the majority of people hear a message about agreeing with one another.

And, referring to the parable of the Good Samaritan, I said that this isn't the point.

Because people are always going to disagree with you.
About God.
About fashion.
About the job you should have.
About where you live.
About the car you drive.

BILLIONS of people will probably disagree with you about something in your life.

So... in light of people not being in agreement about a whole bunch of things the example which we are left with is this...

Don't be a jerk.

Disagree.
Know what you believe.
Know why you believe it.
Listen to other people.
Respectfully discuss.

And most importantly, in line with not being a jerk, show mercy and compassion.

The price of punctuality

Church. Work. School... 
One of these does not belong.

For only one of the options is it okay to be late.

Late to work? You get busted.
Ditto for school.

But turn up late for church? Meh, no big deal.

Constantly late for work? You'll get fired.
Constantly late for school? The consequences will get progressively more dire.

But constantly turn up late for church? We'll consider changing the service to accommodate you!

Now I want to make it clear that I understand that sometimes you're actually late. It happens. 
If you have a family, and leaving the house is almost a military operation, fair enough if it takes a tad longer than you expected.

But I wonder how churches should deal with those who are perpetually tardy.
What should they do with those who always arrive to the church service two songs in?

One option is to elevate the price of punctuality.
You could reward those who are on time. I don't know how this would work (you get half your offering back!), but there's a part of me which thinks, for some, this still wouldn't make a difference.

Another solution could be to teach on the topic of priorities and the significance of church.

Whatever the answer is, and I'm not sure there's an easy fix, there are two things I think churches SHOULDN'T do.


The first misstep, and the most common option, is to lower the value of the start of the service.

Some churches will put some of the less exciting elements, like the notices, at the start or load up the beginning with less popular music since "some will miss out on it anyway."


Another "solution" has been to shift the service just a bit later since "that's when people are arriving anyway."

I think these are not the appropriate course of action since, instead of trying to correct a problem, they send the massage that it is acceptable and accommodated for.

Further, these "solutions" can subtly "penalise" those who are on time.

Finally, what message does this send to visitors to your church when they arrive at the advertised start time and half the congregation are absent?

Delivering the expected sizzle?

Yesterday, to make a point in church, I tore a pot plant from it's soil which was, expectantly, quite messy.

And SPECTACULAR!

In the morning there were gasps from the oldies and an explosion of dirt in the evening.

Now that I'm nearly two months into my new position, I have an escalating fear.

Running out of sizzle.

For the day is coming when I'll have to do a kids talk and struggle to create a thrilling hook.

I'll have a passage...

I'll have a point to make...

I'll get to Saturday night... and

I'll have no sizzle.

And I wonder how it will be received by the church.

Even if that fateful day doesn't arrive for many months, what happens when a church hears a kids talk without the bells-and-whistles?

If there's an air of disappointment is it the fault of those up the front of the church since they've conditioned the congregation to see a spectacular performance which, one day, they couldn't manufacture?

The church sign is for...

It annoys me when bloggers apologise for the lack of posts due to their business so I'll spare you...

I want to make a quick statement about something I've dealt with a number of times. 

In the past I've called them crappy, embarrassing, confusing and cringe-worthy.

Of course, I'm referring to signs outside of churches.

I want to make something clear.

If you work for a church, pull up an chair, affix your eyes to the computer screen and lend me a few precious moments.

Church signs are not for those who go to your church. In theory, any regular attendee will find out anything you could possibly put on a church sign from going to church on a Sunday or alternate internal communication devices.

They are for those OUTSIDE the church community.

And...
They understand your jargon.
They have no idea what your groups are called.
They don't care about your pithy saying gleaned off the Internet.
In fact, usually your slogans will drive people away from your church, not encourage them to visit.

They want to know what you can provide for them.
They want to know what to expect if they decide to turn up on a Sunday.
They want to know, if they did darken your church's door, that what they hear will be relevant to they life.

Church-sign-crafters everywhere... Lend me your ears!

Remember who your primary audience is...

Is communication the #1 thing?

It took a six weeks, but I've finally started a full schedule of face-to-face ministry activities at my new church. Thus I've had a very full week.

In an average week during school term I'll do four scripture classes, kids club, youth group and lead the evening service.

Additionally, I'll do a kids address in the morning and the sermon every fortnight.

All in all, this routine isn't unusual for someone with my job (and I can squeeze plenty more into it!).

Those with my job do a lot of up front activities.

We give talks, both short and long, for a range of ages.
We run and explain games.
We co-ordinate activities.
We plan and execute lessons.

So... this leads me to my question... Do youth ministers need to be good communicators?

I ask because it is usually the case.

But is it a NEED?

I think not.

Anyone with my job needs to be comfortable standing before others and communicate clearly, but there is a far greater quality required.

Any youth minister NEEDS to be strong at relationships, not communication.

This is what matters most.

Why?

Because, to quote a John Maxwell-ism, people don't care how much you know (or how well you you may be able to communicate it) until they know how much you care.

Should the church pay tax?

A lack of knowledge has never stopped me from sharing my opinion.

Last night a TV program did a story on Hillsong and the church, or any large church, not paying taxes (you can watch it at http://aca.ninemsn.com.au/article.aspx?id=8612601 and a reply letter to an earlier story from Hillsong here).

About this topic I'm fairly ignorant and much smarter people than I have written plenty about this before.

So, from my position of unawareness...
and open to the accusation of hypocrisy since a portion of my salary has been tax free...
and since no one asked my opinion...

Here are my Ramblings on the subject.

Do I think churches should pay taxes? I believe they should... BUT

I understand the arguments for the church not doing so.

It is reasoned that many churches would go broke if they had to pay taxes and the services they provide would be seriously slashed.

And that point is, largely, tough to refute. I know plenty of churches who are struggling financially.

And here is where my BUT comes into the equation.

I think churches should have to pay taxes once they have a working budget of, say (and I'm just plucking this figure out of the air), half a million dollars (this would certainly eliminate the small struggling churches).

For here is where the Hillsong story makes people's blood boil since they make a heap of cash from multiple revenue streams.

BUT... What if the amount a church had coming into it's coffers affected the amount of tax it coughed up, just like personal income?

From my limited understanding I would like to see incoming donations, like offerings, and any outgoing revenue used for services to the community, like a soup kitchen or op shop, remain tax exempt.

From what I can grasp, this is what the law permits and was implemented to protect. Charitable acts and services are tax free.

But I have a problem, despite what it might do to the bottom line of churches, with churches getting money from rental, conferences, book, television, DVD or music sales and have that remain tax exempt.

I might be off base, and I have been before, but somehow it doesn't feel 100% kosher...

Another evaluation marker?

This is just a quick post squeezed in around a hectic week of double preaching, multiple pancake making and consuming, new scripture classes, RSL lunches and my wife potentially breaking her ankle and loosing mobility (a real downer with an eleven month old!).

But I just stumbled over this post which mentions an interesting evaluating marker for ministries.

How are the relationships within the group?

The author mentions friendships which exist between the group and the closeness between the leaders and the teens, but I like the romantic spin that is expanded.

For those who are dating, are they healthy relationships?

If you had leaders dating, are they setting good examples?

When/if a couple, either teens or leaders, break up how do they treat one another?

Random Rambles

My phone is full of half baked blog post ideas. I used to flush them out with an end of year Ramble-a-thon (which I did in 2008 & 2009). 

This post will serve as a way to clear a bit of space in my potential-posts folder.

So... Here are some questions I never quite got around to distilling down to an answer...

When do prayer points become gossip?
When does the line between pastoral care and being a busy body get crossed?

When measuring success, what matters more, what you get out or what you put in?

When did virginity become a problem to be dispensed with quickly, not treasured?

How many people are unhappy with their church? 
Would it be more than those who work for churches? 
And, who is in a better position to change things they are dissatisfied with?

Not all glamour

I spent last Thursday creating a database of the 100 or so children who went through the kids club at my new church in 2012.

It. Took. All. Day.

Half the database was typed up at my Mum's while she was looking after Hanna and she recognised a hidden secret about my profession.

It's not all glam in the world of youth ministry.

It's not all playing games and cracking side-splitting puns.
It's not all creating inspiring bible studies or life changing sermons (I wish!).
It's not all lunches at the RSL.

One of my tasks tomorrow is to create the attendance records which I'll use for the year ahead, and whilst it might not be edge-of-your-seat exciting, it's an important thing to get done.

For, even though it might not get you springing out of bed, databases and attendance records are a part of the ministry lube which makes everything run a little smoother.

Two filters for new events

Sometimes when I'm pondering events or activities I have suggestions pop into my mind which, upon a few seconds of rational thought, are swiftly rejected.

Two filters which any potential event must navigate are the effect it would have on younger Christians and non-believers.

What kind of example would the proposed event set for the believers who are younger than you? Could you take an 18 year old to the activity? 

and

If a person who didn't go to church asked what you did, what message would the get from hearing about your activity? If they asked if an activity is "okay with the bible" and the "church is cool with it" can you honestly answer in the affirmative? 

If an event can successfully negotiate these two hurdles then it's closer to becoming reality...

Lots of first dates at the RSL

I want to be clear. My marriage is going just fine.

But over the last week I've been on five first dates.
I have another six separate dates to go on over the next few weeks.

By now, as I've mentioned before, I'm a youth-minister-first-date-master.

Who have I been wooing?
My new youth group leaders.

One at a time.
Over lunch.
At the local RSL.
Followed by a game of pool and/or snooker (you can read the reason why here).
Everything my treat.

By the end of the month my heart should explode via a roast meat and gravy overload.

Why am I buying all my leaders lunch?
Why would I fork out my hard earned dosh?

Time + Knowledge = Building trust.

If I spend time with my leaders, getting to know one another by sharing our heart for the youth ministry, then trust is slowly built.

It's a way to grow my starting chips by making initial deposits in the investment bank early in my new ministry placement.

But it worked for me....

This post makes me nervous because it might flame into a morethendodgeball-guest-post type of controversy...

I wonder if people look back on their own personal experience with "but it worked for me" glasses which then affect their stance on certain grayish issues.

I fear that some people develop a well-it-worked-for-me-mindset so to do likewise should be alright, when actually, they are the exception to the rule or quickly forget how they narrowly escaped a risky situation.

An easy example would be the appropriate number of post-school trips.

I went on... three. That's right, three.

Not just one at the end of year 12. But three. One dose of schoolies at Noosa and two bouts of toolies at Surfer's Paradise.

And, overall, they didn't really harm anyone (aside from one case of AWFUL yellow hair dye).

But I wouldn't recommend it now to a school leaver. It wasn't a wise decision to make.

I wonder how many have their opinions on the following questions slanted by the way they acted when they were younger...

Who is it wise for Christians to date?
How many drinks do you have until you've had too many?
How far is too far sexually before marriage?
Do I need to commit to a church as a teen or young adult?