Yesterday's post created (and still may) good chatter. The purpose of this series is to get people thinking. If you disagree, or have something to add, then go crazy.
They say that if you write something and everyone agrees with what you say, then you've wasted your time in writing...
So finally... after looking at wisdom, compatibility and influence, we get to...
BIBLICAL EXAMPLE
1 Corinthians 10, while speaking about the Old Testament, says "These things happened to them as examples and were written down as warnings for us..."
For me, two apt examples spring to mind. Solomon and Samson.
1 Kings 11 speaks about the wives/concubines of Solomon and the influence they had on him. We read that "...his wives turned his heart after other gods, and his heart was not fully devoted to the LORD his God..."
Like i said in yesterdays comments, your danger of drifting away from God is heightened by the company you keep. We see this in the subsequent actions and attitudes of Solomon.
Similarly, we encounter this with Samson and Delilah in Judges 16. Through engaging in a relationship with a non-believer, things turn sour. Admittedly, Samson wasn't the most upstanding bloke, but we should glean the lesson.
She had another allegiance and this effected the two of them.
When you date someone who holds some other worldview, I'm troubled to see how it turns out productively.
If nothing else, in light of what you're both living for and experience (both biblical and in life) it seems to be unwise.
what about the stats? as you've said, 2/3 of the church are female, leaving 1/3 male. does that mean half the women in the church are destined to a life of singledom as they shouldn't be with non-christians? not even possible! i know some christians are called to be single, but i'm sure its not half the women of the church. we have no choice but to date outside the church if we want to be married and have a family.
ReplyDeleteI agree that the church is quite female heavy, but I’m not convinced that this means that there is no other choice than to choose a tougher long-term option.
ReplyDeleteAs a guy i don't pretend to understand fully the difficulties that women face, but it seems like an excuse...
There are guys about. And just because it may be hard to find one, I’m not sold that the reason flies when compared to the other choice.
Anyway, it's not like a bloke can have his pick of any woman he desires. They find it tough as well. That's how relationships work.
Everyone should choose what they are looking for in a partner. I just suggest that holding the same world-view is at the top of the list...
They're actually not 'about' as much as you think they are.
ReplyDeleteIn the right relationship it doesn't have to be a 'tougher' option.
There are plenty of Christians out there who are more than perfectly happy in their mixed faith relationship.
It's dead set not about waiting for the right Christian. It can sometimes be missing out altogether.
Christians are instructed to do plenty of things which aren't the most convenient (being a virgin on your wedding night would be a good example). I'm just not sold that this is s good enough reason to mess with an unwise practise.
ReplyDeleteIf you can't share the most important thing in your life with someone you share your life with (if you get married), what does it say about your relationship?
Personally, when I’m asked this question about dating, this is the answer I’ve come up with.
If you can fairly read the bible, and can find a different answer to the question, then my ears are open.
I just don't see one.
Well with the passages you mentioned, Samson was with someone who was actually trying to bring him down. She was not trustworthy. She sold him out and probably didn't live him. We're not talking about people who are evil and are trying to bring about downfall. We're talking about people who are just like you abd me but dont have Jesus.
ReplyDeleteIf they ARE this vindictive then yes, a Christian should not be with them.
I'm not saying it's not unwise- you should definitely be careful about it- and I'm not saying it's the best. Of course it would be easier to date another Christian. But life isnt easy, nor is it black and white.
I dunno each to their own opinion. I agree that it would be amazing to share your faith with your 'life partner'. But maybe not so do-able.
17 and a half years ago I started dating a non Christian guy. I did it because he was my soul mate. Also because all of the single guys at my church at the time were being really "spiritual" and apparently being spiritual involved not "seeing" girls. Anyhow we got engaged and then married. Did he lead me away from God? No. We go to your church now. We are both committed Christians and raising our daughter to be. It is possible (and if we believe in a wonderful God perhaps to be expected) that seeing the faith someone you love has in God will lead the non believer to God rather than the reverse. I don't think it is very helpful to make general statements and I don't think the bible makes general statements on this subject. Yes there are examples of it going really wrong but I know of three more people who love God now because I dated a non Christian. If my daughter started dating a non- Christian I would want her to ask some serious questions but if he was the right man for her I would trust in God to sort some of that stuff out. Life really isn't that black and white there are a million shades of grey and I don't think that is cop out I think it is a chance for God to be incredibly gracious.
ReplyDelete